Funny pickup lines
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Post some of the funniest pickup lines you know here. Here’s a duo of examples:
I’m like a Rubik’s Cube, the more you play with me the stiffer I get.
I’m going to have hook-up with you tonight, you might as well be there to love it.
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Just thought of another one:
I lost my teddy bear, can you sleep with me?
does this smell like chloroform to you?
Jesus: Want to see my Holy Land?
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If I threw this quarter, what are the chances of me getting head?
I told one of my very brief friends to go up to a lady and say:
"Hey, baby! Ever do it in a suitcase?"
Not exactly a good pickup line but I think its funny.
If I was a squirrel, I’d bust a nut in your fuckhole.
chick: so what do you do for a liveing?
me: im a dolphin shaver actualy
damsel: dolphins dont have hair?!
me: exactly. im a very busy man. but it pays well so how about i buy you a drink?
baby I’m like a rubix cube the more you play with me the tighter i get
In reply to Arasane, #12:
"Am I nice enough? Or do you need another drink?"
How long can you hold your breath?
"Is there a mirror in your pocket? Because I am sure I can see myself in your pants."
do you work at subway? because you just gave me a foot long.
from the master himself.
Caboose: Tex, I think you are pretty, and you haven’t hurt my assets in a long time, so I was hoping that we could talk and be friends maybe, and hold arms and you could go with me, and when you went with me you would be my real doll friend
Hey baby you wanna join the math club? Add me and you, subtract our cloths, dive your gams then multiply!
"Im not one for pick up lines, but you look doable. So how bout it?"
So, uh, I herd you liek Mudkips
wanna come back to my place and play naked leap-frog?
Do you like dancing? You have three options: We can waltz at the dance hall; we can boogy in the nightclub, or we can go back to my place, and do the matress mambo
nice gams, what time do they open
I have a book with these in.
"You turn my software into hardware."
"I am a magical being. Take off your hooter-sling."
"I’m Welsh. Do you have any Welsh in you? Want some?"
"That clothing would look good crumpled on the floor of my bedroom."
"You know, your hair and my cushion go flawless together."
"Let’s do breakfast tomorrow. Shall I call you or nudge you?"
"I’d buy you a drink but I’d be jealous of the straw."
"I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can still make your Bedrock."
"Hi. Do you gulp?"
"I’m writing a phone book. Can I have your number?"
"I think I could fall madly in bed with you."