Why cushion talk matters: Talking instantly after hook-up makes couples feel closer and more secure, claims scientist
Published: 15:04 BST, twenty four December two thousand thirteen | Updated: 15:29 BST, twenty four December two thousand thirteen
Many people feel more convenient exposing their true feelings, hopes and stresses to a playmate after hook-up and now one researcher thinks she knows why.
Amanda Denes believes cushion talk is an undervalued ingredient in a satisfying and bearing relationship and is linked to the production of the ‘trust hormone’ called oxytocin, which is released after orgasm.
She found that women who orgasmed disclosed more intimate feelings to their playmate after hook-up than women who did not orgasm, which enlargened the emotional bond inbetween couples.
Amanda Denes believes post-sex cushion talk can influence relationship satisfaction just as much as other factors, such as the frequency and satisfaction of hookup itself
The Assistant Professor in the Department of Communication at the University of Connecticut, became interested in investigating the role of cushion talk in relationships as people have such different practices of it.
Many people said they open up about their feelings to a fucking partner after lovemaking regardless of the length of a relationship – a time period described as the post-coital time interval (PCTI) by researchers Daniel Kruger and Susan Hughes.
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‘Why were some people sharing their innermost feelings, even when they knew the relationship had not yet reached that level? What effects would these post-coital disclosures have on relationship satisfaction?’ Professor Denes wrote in an article for the university.
To explore the relationship inbetween hormones and communication decisions, she looked at what people talked about during PCTI as well as ‘one significant variable [that] was likely influencing this entire process – orgasm.’
‘To overlook the importance of orgasm would be to overlook a key chunk of the pillow-talk puzzle ,’ she said.
Both studs and women practice a post-climax oxytocin surge but testosterone is believed to dampen the effects so that fellows typically fell less warm and fuzzy after hookup. A polarised view of crystals of Oxytocin is pictured
When individuals practice orgasm, physiological switches occur as a hormone called oxytocin floods their bods.
Increases in this ‘trust hormone’ have been linked to many socially beneficial behaviours.
Both dudes and women practice a post-climax oxytocin surge but testosterone is believed to dampen the effects so that boys typically fell less warm and fuzzy after hook-up.
Professor Denes found that women who orgasmed disclosed more intimate feelings to their playmate after sexual activity than women who did not orgasm.
Professor Denes found that women who orgasmed disclosed more intimate feelings to their fucking partner after sexual activity than women who did not orgasm
Professor Denes believes that oxytocin is the reason why, as women who orgasm have more of the hormone in their systems, which increases feelings of trust and connection, than women who did not, influencing individuals’ decisions to talk about their feelings to their playmates.
She explained that women may talk more about their feelings after lovemaking than guys as men’s higher levels of testosterone suppresses the oxytocin response.
Individuals in a committed relationship perhaps unsurprisingly disclosed more intimate feelings to their playmates after hookup than those in newer or more short-term relationships, Professor Denes said.
A previous explore found that the afterglow of an orgasm minimises the risks and increases the benefits of disclosing private information.
STAY AWAKE CHAPS: Cushion TALK Indeed DOES MATTER TO THE LADIES!
Scientists have found that women whose playmates finish off a night of passion by instantly turning over and nodding off are left feeling insecure and longing affection.
Psychologists at the University of Michigan said cuddling and talking after hook-up is a crucial way for a duo to express their commitment to each other, in a examine published last January.
In relationship terms, they said it could be just as significant as what happens before hook-up, or even the act itself.
They questioned four hundred fifty six heterosexual people who ended online surveys about their sleep patterns with their playmate.
Lead author Dr Daniel Kruger said they found the participants’ desire for emotional bonding, affection and communication was greatest when their fucking partner fell asleep very first.
This was found in both dudes and women but a wealth of previous studies have shown studs invariably fall asleep very first.
Dr Kruger said: ‘When their playmate feel asleep very first, they craved that bonding time, for expressions of affection and endearment and felt it was lacking.
‘A woman could be pregnant. Albeit with contraception that may not be the case anymore, we still have this psychology, and the post-coital time is when the duo makes promises to each other and establish commitment.
‘The time couples spend together after hook-up might be as significant as what happens before it in terms of building the relationship yet it has uncommonly been studied.’